My name is ren

  • Everyone who knows me calls me Ren, everyone who knows me know I battle anxiety and depression. On September of last year I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder which is known as a mood disorder that is both schizophrenia , depression and anxiety I was inform this was the name for what i have which is I hear voices in my head and see things that aren't there plus having anxiety and depression, I am heavily medicated which is why I'm not having or posting about my episodes with it. 

    I have very supportive friends with this, family some do some don't but those who don't understand it. Do I feel different yeah I do I feel like my favorite character from marvel comics who is a mutant name David Haller tho the fx series portrayal of him feeling not normal feel out of place in the world which my therapist say its common for those who have schizoaffective disorder, even tho I started to believe normal is just a word and that I am okay with who I am and know there isn't a cure for what I have sure i'll be on medication the rest of my life but my biggest fear is being in relationships due to what I struggle with, I ended one a few weeks ago due to my overthinking and letting my anxiety and depression take over I pushed them away when I suffer from it . 

    I hope one day I can overcome my anxiety hell i feel judged by my friends when they aren't doing that I hate having the paranoia. well thats it a bit of me to know about. 

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